Social Media: Build the Experience, Build Friendships
- Image by carf via Flickr
Think of your closest friends… what makes them close to you? Can you tell a humorous story about the time that you guys, you know… or how you were stranded and they came to your rescue? How many times have you been to their houses, or had them over to your house? If you think back on your friendship, when did you first become really, really, really good friends?
You either don’t know how it happened, it just happened, or you can point out a momentous experience in your life when you bonded. However it happened, friendship is built on experiences, sometimes bit by bit and other times dramatically.
So how do you build friendships online?
Familiarity First
The Current Experience
When you think of your friends, think about how your first came to know them. Did they live down the street, work with you or attend the same exercise class? Chances are your first contact was in an environment that created repeated social exposure to the person. Repeated exposure develops a familiarity with that person. “Oh, there’s that guy again who always walks his dog by my house!” You begin to expect to see them. You might know them by name or not, but they become part of how you and they experience life.
Online networks work just the same, only you need to be participating and fostering participation. Just existing online is not going to be enough. People will become familiar with you as you become part of a social media community.
Build on Common Beliefs
Common Past Experiences
While you might have different religious, political or moral beliefs than your friends, chances are there is some commonality that binds you together. It could be a love for the outdoors, you both have the same dog breed and more than likely you do share the same religious, political or moral beliefs. We tend to be drawn to people that we see as like us. We tend to surround ourselves with people that share common interests. It is much easier to socialize when we feel others will relate to our past experiences because they have had a similar past.
Social media makes this even easier through blogs, forums, groups and websites that are dedicated to specific interests. When looking to build an online network of friends, you need not go any further than your own interests.
Constant Contact Stengthens Friendship
Build on Future Experiences
Continual contact with friends help to bond that friendship and create a feeling of unity. When I think of my closest friends I think of the many times we have laughed together and the times we’ve spent together. And it varies from just going to the movies, having them over for drinks or taking a 3 day road trip. The key is building on experiences together.
There are many ways you can build experiences together. Creating ways for them to participate with you on your own blog. Ask for people’s input and advice. Set up online meetings or groups focused on a common goal. All of these can help foster a feeling of social participation.
But I’m a business/consultant/marketer and I want to make money, not friends!
- Image via Wikipedia
One of my favorite quotes, that I’ve quoted before and will probably quote again, comes from sales guru Jeffrey Gitomer.
“All things being equal, people want to do business with their friends. All things being not quite so equal, people still want to do business with their friends.”
This, I feel, represents the heart of social media marketing. People want to feel like they are doing business with people they like and that in turn like them. You may not be out to build a life long friend, maybe just a friendly acquaintance. Then again, you may be surprised at the relationships you build.
Whether you are the frontman for a large corporation or a small mom-and-pop organization, taking the time to build friendships will have a huge impact on your professional outcome.
How do you think building friendships through social media has helped or can help your marketing goals?
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let’s be friends!